Imagine, if you will, a time when a 5-year-old boy needs a haircut. In the muggle world this is probably a non-issue. In our world it is hysterical.
1. Prepare. First you need to get a cat. Preferably an un-neutered male cat, feral and rabid. Now make him mad. I mean really, really mad. Perhaps get a Democrat cat and tell him that you like Sarah Palin’s glasses. Okay. Now put him in the washing machine, climb in with him and have someone hand you scissors. Turn washing machine on spin. Have cat, washing machine & scissors ensemble delivered to Super Cuts. Say that you need a little boy’s haircut. Of course it will sound more like, “Thunk, splash, ouch, Meow, I drive a Prius!”
Anyway, once you have dabbed the 5-year-old ears and neck with Neosporin, dispensed anti-anxiety medication to the other patrons at Super Cuts, please pay the $10.00 for the cut and $20.00 for a tip. Please don’t forget to add a little for therapy. You can leave the cat too. Leave Super Cuts and don’t feel bad when they put the closed sign up each time you drive by.
2. Do it yourself. Just don’t let anyone get too close to him for the next two weeks and if they do, tell them his father did it.
Gotta' Love him!