Wednesday, February 25, 2009

And what did we learn today?

Bee school is very cool. This is what I learned (this my interpretation, just so you don't question the professionalism of the bee school instructor)

Ok, there are three cliques of bees. There are the workers. They are girls (of course) They have different jobs. Some are nurses, foragers, scouts, interior designers, etc. Their function is to feed the hive, keep it clean and do general housekeeping duties.

Then there is the queen. Well I don't know if you remember a song by Train back in the 90's that goes something like,

"Well she wants to be the queen,
then she thinks about the scene.
Pulls her hair back as she screams,
I don't really want to be the Queen."

Well you don't want to be the Queen. Her job is pretty much to get all dolled up, go out on the town and get BUSY with as many guys as she can find and then go back home and have babies for the rest of her life, until the workers decide they want a new queen and kick her to the curb. Not fun.

Then there are the drones. The drones are males. They do nothing. They don't gather food, they don't clean the house, they don't help with the larvae. Typical. What they do is go to a place (I think he called it the drone congretating area) kind of like a pick up bar. Here they wait, doing nothing. Probably drinking beer, telling lies, farting and waiting to hit on chicks. Well the queen comes along all dressed up in her Saturday night boots and halter top with two squirts of Jean Ne'te that she got for Christmas and as soon as a good song comes on she's getting groovy with the fellas. It might be Garth Brooks or Skynard, depends on her mood. Then she leaves and they just sit around waiting for another one. AND, when the good season is over, when there isn't any food left to gather? Well the workers kick the drones out of the hive no matter how old they are. They will actually pick up drone babies and just carry them outside and they will die because they don't know how to feed themselves. Really! Isn't this cool! I can't wait for the next class.


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